Coming Clean
by crowEn
Summary: After their death, Lupin and Black find a way out of the veil of death, and return home. It starts off a bit serious, sorry
1. Chapter 1

My beta reader was bothered that in my other story 'The wolves and the lamb' that I never bothered to explain how Remus and Sirius came back. So this will just be a short bit, maybe 3 chapters or so, to explain how they came back from the dead, and how they came to be living together and... in love?

I have no idea. I also did not have her read this, so if you notice any mistakes... lemme know3

* * *

"Come clean, Mate. This actually is hell, isn't it?" Sirius was looking down the long endless line of identical houses.

"For the last time, no." Lupin couldn't hold back the little smile that was forming. He did not know how long they had been here in the serene suburbia. But time had little to no meaning in a place like this.

"It's so boring." Sirius was not whining, just grumping. After years in Azkaban and then being secluded in his childhood home, all he had wanted was to run free. Then he died. Somehow death was worse than either incarceration. The sky was always a lightly clouded noon and the streets were the same repeating, cookie cutter houses. Remus had assured him many times that it was not hell. Sirius knew that his old friend must be wrong. Surely a place as unchanging and boring as where he stood must either be hell …or Sussex. He ran his rough hands through his messy black locks. "Come on, Moony. Let's go on a walk or something. I can't stand just sitting here."

Remus smiled again and walked with his friend. Death was not so bad in his opinion. He knew that the war was over and their side had won, he also had the chance to be with Sirius again. Remus had known that he had missed his dear friend, but he had not realized just how much until he found him again.

That day had been the same as every other once since he had arrived. But that afternoon (despite the fact that every day, at every time was noon) he heard yelling. At first he had been weary to investigate, but there was something familiar about the noise. When he finally traced down the source he was surprised if not delighted to see that it was Sirius Black… smashing things and yelling at the debris. It seemed that they were the only two people trapped in the never changing space.

Eventually he reached the conclusion that it must be some sort of purgatory, but certainly not hell. If it was hell they would not have found one another.

They walked, for either a few minute or a few years; it did not matter how long. Then without warning the houses gave way to grassy plains. Sirius whooped and started running through the tall grass. Remus laughed at the sight and kept his more sedate pace.

"Do you see it, Moony, do you? It's different."

"Yes, Padfoot, I see it." A warm smile colored his voice.

They stayed in the field for a long time, days moving into weeks, until Sirius grew board of the fact that it too did not seem to change other than the long stalks blowing like waves in the gentle wind. He would often disappear, searching for something, anything really. Remus chose to lie in the cool grass, watching the clouds.

**

"You have to come with me." Sirius demanded, tugging on the old werewolf's arm. "It never changes when I go alone."

"I don't see how me coming will make the slightest bit of difference." He stood, chestnut eyes smiling around the edges.

"Don't be a stick in the mud, just come on."

It was strange to see how almost immediately the world changed when the two crested the hill that Remus had been resting on. There, in the soft shadows were old ruins. Crumbling grey stone wall that had stood for what looked like centuries, surrounded brittle towers and mossy courtyards.

"See, I told you it would change." He let go of Remus's hand and ran down the hill at full tilt.

"It is possible that you have just never gone over this hill before."

"Sod off, Moony." He was already a distance off, climbing over the low walls. "Well, come on, I don't have all day." His barking laugh rang off the hills. "Actually I do. I have all the time in the world." His mess of dark hair disappeared over the wall.

Remus chuckled to himself and kept walking. Little rocks crunched under his shoes as he walked around the wall instead of following his friend's example and going over it. He stopped dead. Sirius was standing on the balls of his feet, gazing up at a softly billowing curtain that hung suspended by a fragile looking stone arch

"I know this." Sirius's voice had taken on a dream like quality. "I've been here before."

"Sirius, get away from that." Remus recognized it too. That curtain, as innocent as it looked, had haunted his dreams until he died. "Sirius, stop!" He ran forward as his friend took the final few steps towards the innocuous drapery. And then Sirius Black was gone.

Topping over himself in an effort to stop before he too was consumed by damask, Remus Lupin stood stairing at the place that his companion had been only moments before. "Sirius… you can't die when you're already dead!" He yelled into the folds of the curtain. "How can you even… why … would you leave me." He ran his hands shakily through his grey flecked hair. He didn't want to be left alone in the quiet world. With a sharp intake of breath he followed after Sirius.

**

It was a great uncertainty as to what Lupin expected to find on the other side of the veil. What he had not expected, above all else was one of the inner chambers of the Ministry of Magic. "Sirius?" His voice was hesitant.

Bounding around from the other side of the curtain came his gaunt friend. "Moony, were home." He lifted the slender werewolf and spun him round.

Lupin looked around, eyes trying to foucus on the world around him, senses taking in the smell of cold stone and the musk that was distinctly Sirius. A small smile started to grow as he untangled himself from the long arms of his friend. "I think, for once, you're right."


	2. Chapter 2

Number twelve, Grimmauld Place had always felt more like a prison than a home to Sirius Black. For that reason he was almost livid when Lupin suggested that that be where they move to. Harry had been so overjoyed to see his godfather and mentor still alive, that he did not mind giving up the home to them. Sirius tried to refuse, but somehow found himself standing in the entryway to his childhood home. Reluctantly he walked in beside Lupin.

It was not so bad at first. Then they passed the threshold and the portrait of Walburga Black. "Shame of my flesh!" Her voice rang in the halls.

Sirius winced and scowled at the painting. "Who uncovered the old bird?"

"She's your mother." Lupin frowned, either at the noise or at Sirius, it was a bit unclear.

"If we are going to stay here the first thing we do is find a way to take her down. Because I would rather sleep outside."

"Blood traitors!" She continued her lamenting. "Haven't you even the decency to stay dead? You are no son of mine. Get out of my house."

Sirius looked at the slender werewolf who was wincing beside him. "The first thing."

**

Taking down the monstrous painting proved to be harder than they had thought, and for the first few nights Sirius did sleep outside. Lupin tried to just keep the painting covered and pretend that she was not there. Sirius on the other hand seemed to take a strange perverse delight in tormenting the frail old woman in the painting as he struggled to find a spell that would take her off the wall.

One such afternoon was passing and Lupin could hear, from the downstairs kitchen, Walburga shouting at her son that he needed to have children. That thought made the werewolf pale. He could imagine the trouble that a herd of little Sirius's would do. It was a terrifying scenario to contemplate. Terrifying, but in a way, almost cute. He ascended the stairs to tell his friend that their meal was ready (they would have had Kreacher cooking for them, but the house-elf strictly refused to have anything to do with either of them)

"No, you daft old bitty. I don't care if the line dies out." Sirius was growling from between his teeth.

"What are you doing?" Lupin couldn't help but ask.

Sirius paused, one foot against the wall for leverage, and in his hands a branch from outside that he had somehow managed to wedge behind the painting. "Trying things the muggle way?" He offered with a shrug and continued to try and pry the painting down.

His mother wailed at the thought, and this sent up a chorus from the other paintings down the hall. "Muggle way?" she clasp her boney hands over her heart as though she would faint. "My son, abandoning magic and refusing to have children. Shame of my flesh."

"You already said that." He abandoned the branch and rubbed his hands on his pant legs.

"Doomed to die alone. His stubbornness will be the end of our family line." More paintings were starting to cry. It was almost comical and Remus had to lower his head to hide a little smile.

"I won't be alone." He slipped a long arm around Remus's narrow shoulders.

His mother roller her head back, letting out a moan of despair. "That filthy blood traitor? He can't have sons for you."

"No, but that hasn't stopped us from trying." He leaned down and planted a firm kiss on his unsuspecting friend.

It was at that point that Walburga Black fainted, so she was not witness to Lupin squirming out of Sirius's embrace and hastily wiping his mouth. "You tease your poor old mother all you want, but you leave me out of this, Padfoot."

Sirius's grin was wide enough that it threatened to split his face in two. "Are you blushing?"

"Lunch is ready." Remus hurried off down the hall, eager to escape the joyful barking laughter of the madman.

He busied himself with putting food on the table and pausing to wipe his mouth for the umpteenth time. Sirius had always been a bit of a 'free spirit', but Remus wanted no part of it.

And as he thought of the devil, so he was, Sirius Black slid up on almost silent feet behind him. His voice was soft and low. "Is that a wand in your robe, or are you just happy to see me?"

Remus awkwardly turned round and hit at his friend's chest. "Just go sit down and eat, you useless lump."

But Sirius did not leave as he was told; instead he slipped an arm back around the slender werewolf and grinned down at him. "Hey, Remy, is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can really see myself in your pants?"

Even knowing he should not encourage his friend, Remus could not hold back the quiet laughter. "What rubbish. Go sit down."

"Hey," Sirius let go and made his way to a chair. "I was proud of that one. It used to work real well for me back at Hogwarts."

Remus had to stop what he was doing to laugh again. "Please don't tell me you actually said that to real people. I'm surprised you weren't hexed more often."

"Hey, now. I will have you know that that is one of my best lines." He took a bite of his food and grinned. "It was a four out of five for its rate of success."

"It was only out of pity, I assure you." Remus did his best to hide his smile.

"Hey, a pity shag is just as good as the real thing." He took a dink of pumpkin juice. "Hey, Moony, you know why the Sorting Hat placed me in Gryffindor?"

Remus blinked at his friend over the table, confused at the sudden change in topic, but before he could answer, Sirius continued.

"I think it's because, like Godric Gryffindor himself, I too have an impressive sword." That simple statement was followed by a somewhat suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

Confusion was quickly replaced with amusement- tempered with disgust. Remus threw some bread at his friend. "You get out of this kitchen, right now."

**

An owl arrived later that week, with a letter from the Ministry. Lupin read it over many times, scarcely believing his eyes. He took the pristine parchment and went to the entry way to show Sirius.

"Do you know what this is?" He smiled and waved it where the man could see it.

Sirius only paused a moment, he had somehow found what muggles called a hack-saw and was busying himself with removing the part of the wall that his mother was affixed to. "A love letter? Congrats, mate."

"What? No." He held the letter to his chest. "It's a letter from the Ministry. They are offering me a job."

Sirius paused again, this time to pull his sweaty shirt off. "That's brilliant." He wiped some sweat from his brow and grinned over at Remus. "I don't suppose you want to help before accepting the position? It's bloody hard work to do things this way."

Remus for a moment had no words anywhere inside of him to offer up. His brown eyes traveled over Sirius's lithe form. The man was all hard, lean muscle and his hips (where they peeked over the edge of his pants) were an almost hypnotic expanse of soft plains and sharp angles. Remus felt his mouth go dry and it was a confusing experience.

"Moony, you alright?" Sirius clapped a hand onto his friends shoulder, and that was enough to bring Remus back from wherever it was his mind had gone.

"Right, I need to go send them back an owl." He turned and walked back up the stairs to his room.

Sirius watched him go, and worried slightly for his friend.

**

Remus started work at the Ministry. He was heading some research on death related magical items, and he had not been happier in years. It was good to be working again. It was good to be doing anything again after being dead (for what had turned out to be only a few months). He felt like he fit in somewhere.

Every day when he returned from work he was greeted by a tired Sirius (who was still attempting to remove the large piece of wall) and a request for dinner. Once Sirius had attempted to cook food on his own, as a surprise for his friend, and the small kitchen fire certainly was surprising if nothing else. But they both agreed it was for the best that the taller of the two stay out of the kitchen unless he could be properly supervised. Despite the normal little problems that arose from living in Grimmauld Place together, both men were fairly content.

Weeks were spent in a sort of haphazard bliss, until one day Remus returned early from work.

He was pleased to see the gaping hole on the wall had been completed. Not knowing where exactly Sirius's mother had gone to, he trod quietly through the hall. He started to go down to the kitchen, thinking to get an early start on dinner, but he had to stop at the landing for the stairwell. Sirius was bustling about in the kitchen, fixing tea in a non-magic way. It was not the wand-less way in which he was occupying his time that made Remus stop. It was the clothes-less way in which his friend was moving about.

As if sensing he was being watched, Sirius looked up to the top of the stairs. There was no embarrassment on his face as he smiled. "You're home early. How was work?"

Finally summoning the will to avert his eyes, Remus studied the wood grain of the wall. "Why, in Merlin's name are you naked?"

He shrugged his narrow shoulders. "I like to feel free?"

"Put some clothes on, please." Remus had, on a small handful of occasions, seen his friend naked before. But they had been in the school showers and pointedly not looking at each other. This new flagrantly careless way Sirius was lounging about was something different and inexplicably distracting.

Sirius watched the guarded expressions that passed over his friends face, and noted the slight pinkness that had crept over his cheeks. "Nope. It's my house."

"You have company over." He ran a nervous hand through his hair, not willing to spare a peek down at the man he was talking to.

"Bollocks, who's here?"

"I am." His voice had taken on a note of distress and he was wondering why he hadn't simply gone back out to the hall at this point in his life.

"You're not a guest… You're just Remus." He thumped up the stairs and placed himself much closer to Remus than the man was comfortable with.

"What are you doing?" He was suspicious, and the way that he almost glared out of the corner of his eye showed it.

"I've got to get past you to go upstairs and get my clothes."

"Just apparate yourself."

"Don't have my wand on me." He liked the way that his friend's cheeks were flushed and how he couldn't keep eye contact. Even if it was just Remus Lupin, his friend of so many years, it was the first time that someone had acted that way with him in… in much longer than he cared to remember.

"And why not?" He was edging back to the hall in a small attempt to escape his friend who was acting stranger than normal.

"No pockets." He placed a hand and head level on the wall beside Lupin, blocking his exit. "Are you blushing, Moony?"

"No, it's warm in here. Go get dressed."

"You know, you were blushing when I kissed you, too." He leaned closer.

"I did no such thing." He pushed at his friend's bare chest and moved to go down the stairs since the other way was blocked.

"Do you fancy blokes?"

"No." He said almost too quickly. It was an honest answer. He had never even considered being attracted to a man; there had always been more important things to worry about. "Do you?" It was another sideways glance accompanied by a nervous shuffle down a step, but it was not fast enough to save him.

Sirius placed his other hand on the wall, blocking both sides. "I've always been a believer in free love. Why would I let a lack of breasts come between me and a good snog?"

"Charming."

He shrugged languidly. "I do what I can… Hey, Remus?"

"Don't." It was an exasperated warning, because he knew that nothing he did was going to stop whatever lewd comment was about to issue from his friends lips.

"I may not be wearing an invisibility cloak, but do you think I could still visit your restricted section tonight?"

"I have no problems with pushing you down the stairs. You do know that, right?" Lupin let his head fall back against the wall and looked at one of the water stains on the ceiling.

"But, Voldamort is coming, and only your love can save me."

"I am taking out my wand." It was a warning, and he only moved slightly to open his jacket.

"I would much rather you take out mine."

Lupin straightened himself and just looked fully into the face of his friend. "Really now?"

"Yeah… that one works better when I have pants on."

"You've actually used that when someone was threatening you?"

He shrugged, running a hand through his wild locks. "What is a threat, other than another way of saying 'yes'?"

Before he could continue with his tirade of horrible come-ons, there was Remus's wand, tucked neatly up under his chin. "I am going to make dinner and you are going to get dressed."

Sirius didn't know if his friend was serious. And knowing the shorter man, he could assume that he was not… but he felt it best not to push his luck anymore than he already had. Well, not to much more in any case. "Alright, but only because you asked so nice." He made a quick dash in, wanting to steal a kiss, if only because he had forgotten how much fun it was to tease his friend.

But Remus sensed him moving and turned his head away. The end result was a sloppy peck on the edge of his ear and a little biting nip that made him flatten himself against the wall in surprise. He turned to tell Sirius off, but all that Remus saw was his friend's bare backside retreating down the hall.

Flushed and shaking, Remus finished the short walk down into the kitchen and stared at the stove for longer than necessary before finally taking off his jacket and starting on the meal.


	3. Chapter 3

Because of the successful removal of his mother's portrait, Sirius deemed the house to be livable once more. After an awkward, but amusing meal, he tromped up stairs to his old bedroom. It was almost how he left it, bed against the wall, posters of scantily clad ladies straddling motorcycles, and clothes scattered about the floor and over the back of his chair. He leaned in close to look at the clothes, wondering how it was that his clothes were still where he had left them after so many years. Then he recognized those simple patches and careful stitching up of holes. He never would have worn rags like that. Flopping down onto the bed and burying his face in the pillow, he knew that smell almost as well as he knew his own.

Lupin had been sleeping in his room while he had banished himself to the backyard. For some reason that thought made him smile in an uncontrollable way. There was something charming about his friend sleeping in his old bed.

As the sound of footsteps reached his ears, the sound of Remus coming upstairs for bed, Sirius's smile turned into a grin. He quickly transfigured himself into the scruffy black dog that felt almost more like himself than his human self did, and slipped beneath the nearest pile of clothes. He burrowed until he was sure that none of him showed and then made himself as still as possible, waiting for the werewolf to return to his lair.

The door opened and Remus came looking tired. He paused and looked around the room, his eyes taking in the pillow that was not where it should be and how the blankets were not as smooth as they were when he left that morning for work. He looked a bit suspicious at first, and Sirius was worried that his plan would not work, but Lupin simply shrugged to himself and started to get ready for bed. His jacket was tossed over the chair and his shirt followed. As he turned around to get into the little wardrobe against the wall, the animagus saw his chance. He leapt from the pile of clothes, sending pants and socks up into the air. He aimed a flying tackle at the slender back of his friend, but it was as if Lupin knew that he was coming, because he turned smoothly around, wand in hand and cast a simple petrifaction spell.

Sirius fell to the floor, stone stiff, and could only see the movement of his friend from the corner of his peripheral vision. Remus loomed closer, kneeling down to put his face beside the scruffy black muzzle. "Next time you're hiding, make sure that your tail isn't wagging." He gave Sirius a rough little head scratch and gently tugged on one of the dark velvety ears. "Yawning out the counter spell, Remus finished getting ready for bed. "I don't know why I let you get away with so much. You're a trouble maker, you know that?"

"I think you like trouble." Sirius had shifted back into his human form and was laying across the bed, taking up as much room as he could while watching his friend changing clothes, and silently convincing himself that there was nothing at all strange about it.

"No." He looked over his shoulder and gave a small smile. "I would be more than happy to settle down and have a peaceful life." He walked over to the bed and frowned slightly. "How long are you staying in here? I have work in the morning."

"This is my room." He settled his back more firmly against the mattress. "But if you ask nice I might let you stay."

Lupin rubbed his eyes. "Not tonight, Padfoot. I don't think I have the energy for anymore of your games."

"Games?" He sat up. "But you were doing so well earlier."

"I just don't think I can keep up with you. Not when you're dishing out so many horrific pickups. And I am emphasizing the _whore_-riffic part of them."

Sirius clapped his hands and let out a sharp barking laugh. "Good one. See, you can be good at this game, too." He rolled slightly to one side so that Remus could join him on the bed.

The werewolf sat and eyed his friend wearily before laying back beside him. He knew by the mischievous look that he was receiving that he would not be getting much sleep if he did not just comply with the simple demands.

"Come on, do another one."

"I'm no good at this. This was you and James's game." He laid an arm over his eyes.

"I could let you borrow some of my old ones I don't use anymore."

He sighed softly. "You can't be serious." He just wanted to go to sleep.

"I'm dead serious." Then he grinned his manic grin and started laughing again. "Do you get it?"

Remus thought for a moment and smiled slightly. At least exchanging puns was a bit better than the conversation on the stairwell that had continued throughout the meal. "I get it."

"You know, I once dated a girl with a wooden leg… but she broke it off." His laughter continued and Lupin felt his smile start to grow. "Do you know what a Freudian slip is?" He rolled over to look better at his friend. "It's when you say one thing but mean your mother."

Remus started laughing softly. He couldn't help himself.

"Come on, now you give one."

"I don't have anything." He tried to gently remove his friend from the bed so that he could get some sleep, all laughter and bad puns aside.

"If you can't give me one, I will have to keep going, and I'm almost out of the clean ones." He scooched to the side for Remus, letting him crawl under the blankets.

Remus thought as hard as he could and considered just putting the hex back on Sirius and getting some sleep. "How many Hufflepuffs does it take to light a wand?" He said through another yawn as he tried to ignore the eager look on Sirius's face that was far too close to his own. "It doesn't really matter, as long as they tried their hardest, that's all that counts."

Sirius just stared at him blankly and then shook his head. "That was… bloody awful. You told an awful joke, I think I might be ashamed to be your friend."

"Oh, bugger off." Remus tried to roll over and escape the crazy man who was still on the bed.

The crazy man under consideration leaned down and kissed Remus's cheek as a way of saying goodnight. "We can try again tomorrow when you get back from work… are you blushing again?"

"I am not blushing. Grown men do not blush. I am simply overly warm under these blankets with you half laying on top of me." He tried not to sound as exasperated as he felt, despite how difficult his friend was being, he didn't want to snap at him.

Sirius still looked a bit taken aback at the almost harsh words from his friend. He lowered his head and changed back into a shaggy dog, laying his head on Remus's chest as a sort of pitiful apology. A ghost of a smile passed over the man's face. "Goodnight, Padfoot."

Remus lay awake for much longer than he planned, petting the long soft ears that would twitch occasionally from his grasp. It was in those starry hours before the dawn that Remus realized that there in that bed, with his best mate beside him, that that is where he wanted to be. It felt like home. Even if there were women of ill repute on the walls and he was sure at this point that the chair smelled of dirty laundry—the familiar weight of Sirius against his side and the soft dog breath the occasionally stirred his lightly graying hair, were welcoming.

He rolled to curl around the hulking shape of his friend in a tired embrace, before lightly kissing the rough black fur that covered his pointed muzzle. He mouthed the words 'I love you', not willing to voice those dreaded words out loud for fear of what horrible calamity might suddenly befall them both. It was enough finally have sorted out how he felt. He had loved the gangly madman like a brother since they were eleven. He was years past that now, so far that he was willing to believe that the whole thing had just been a dream. Now he was getting old and even if his body still felt young, his hair was grayed at the temples and sometimes his knees hurt when rain was coming. Now that all he had left was Sirius, he felt it might be ok, even if only to himself, if he started to think of the man as something more than a brother. Brothers, after all, did not corner another naked in the kitchen and ask to visit one another's 'restricted sections'. The memory of Sirius dishing out that line alone made him smile. Even if Sirius had only been teasing, Remus liked to pretend that it meant a little more, because to him, it did.

The events of the next morning made Remus want to rethink his stance of the pre-decided, silent man-crush. When he awoke it was not to soft puppy breath or to tender puppy eyes. It was to the, far closer than he should be, once more stark naked, long armed, sleeping body of Sirius Black. Sirius lay on his back examining the ceiling for many long, deep breaths. He had no idea why the man was naked again, but it was either because he got too warm during the night, or simply because he enjoyed tormenting his friend. It wasn't so bad, and almost easy to ignore, until Sirius looped one of his long arms around Remus and pulled their bodies closer.

Remus remembered why there had been curtains around their beds when they had been in school. The awkward poking he was receiving to his left hip was an all too clear reminder of his own uncomfortable teenaged mornings that he had outgrown, but apparently Sirius had not. He tried to gently free himself from his friend who had come to resemble something of a harry octopus. Sirius mumbled in annoyance and slipped a leg around the werewolf also.

"Just a bit longer." His voice was heavy with sleep and his eyes had not bothered to open.

"I've got work." He continued his efforts of untangling himself, being mindful of where his hands were.

"I'm almost done." He mumbled with a nuzzle of his shaggy head and a subtle (but to Lupin scandalous) tilt of his hips.

"Absolutely not." He did not yell, but his voice had taken on a note of panic. There were just some things that friends did not do for each other and did not need to witness each other doing. Despite the tightness in his chest and the warmth to his cheeks, he wanted no part in whatever Sirius was doing. He knew his mate did not fancy him that way, and Remus had no want to be a stand in for whoever was gallivanting, undoubtedly naked, in his friend's dreams.

Sirius finally opened his pale gray eyes and looked at the man he was enveloping in a full bodied bear hug. "G'morning, Ducky." He looked to be waking up fully and as he shifted and even had the decency to look a little embarrassed. He chuckled softly. "G'morning." He repeated with a soft chuckle, but it seemed that the last greeting was more to himself then the red-faced man he had yet to release.

"Let go of me, you trollop. I've got to go to work."

"It's Saturday." He buried his face into the soft part of Remus's neck, to escape the sunlight coming in the open window.

"I work Saturdays too." He had difficulty getting the words out.

"Tell them to sod off. Stay home with me." He growled playfully against his friend's ear. "I'll make it worth your while."

The offer was almost too much. But Remus was firmly in his closet on the matter and refused. After all, it wasn't a real offer. "You have nothing to offer that I want."

"Your rosie cheeks say different, mate." He copied the same move he had the before dinner only hours ago. With a growl his teeth captured the soft curve of Remus's ear. And he was rewarded with a sharp elbow to the ribs.

"Stop it. Just because you're gagging for a shag doesn't mean that I want to be your warm up practice. So stop being… you." He freed himself finally and stood, hair a mess and pants slightly askew.

"Calm down, Mooney. You're acting like a woman. It's not like a fancy you." He smirked. "I don't want you, mate. Not even for practice."

Remus stiffened, not knowing why that hurt as much as it did. He just stood there, looking gobsmacked and not knowing what to say. He decided to let his face settle somewhere between anger and apathy as he ran a hand through his hair and grabbed some clothes for the day.

Sirius looked almost… serious for the first time in weeks, but it was ruined by a sly smile that crinkled up the edges of his eyes. "When you get angry, you're a right sexy bastard. Did you know that?"

"Cheeky." Was all he could manage before fleeing the room and locking himself in the bathroom so he could find some peace before having to go to work.

Sirius lay in bed, listing to the shower running, wondering to himself exactly what had just happened. He had tried to just carry it off like he always did, but the look that Remus had given him had hurt. It wasn't often that he was shot down so expertly. Not with normal people, Remus had been shooting him down for over a decade. It hurt a bit less each time, not because he knew that he was wearing the man down, he was just desensitizing himself to the sting of those words.

He pulled the pillow over his head and breathed softly, attempting to catch the dream that had gone darting away far too early for his tastes. But it remained elusive and all he could think about was the way that Remus had been watching him for days, and they way that he kept blushing. A niggling little thought crept into his mind. It was something that he had not considered since his Hogwarts days.

Pulling on some pants (he knew how his flagrant nudity could be upsetting to his delicate roommate) he dashed downstairs, eager to intercept Remus before he made it to the fireplace. "Remy, don't grab that floo powder." He stumbled slightly on the turned up edge of a rug that decorated the floor of the library.

Remus paused and gave his friend an almost icy stare. "What now, Sirius?"

"I…" It had all sounded so nice in his mind as he rehearsed it years ago. But he was younger than, and the words seemed stupid now. He shrugged and just went for it, figure at this point in his life he had nothing to lose, because if Remus got angry, he could always just pretend he was joking. "All of my young life, I searched for someone to love, someone to make me complete. I choose partners and changed partners. I danced to a song of heartbreak and hope, all the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, someone perfect was searching for me." He had to bite his lip. It had sounded so much cooler when he was young and first realized how he felt about the frowning man before him. Now it just sounded hokey and he wanted to take it back.

"What are you going on about?" Remus glanced at the clock above the mantel; he was going to be late for work.

The cards already seemed like they were on the table, he took a sharp breath and asked the one question that he had never quite gotten out when they were younger. "Do you fancy me?"

Remus's face took on the same pink that he had been sporting almost all week. He frowned deeper. "I don't want to play this game anymore, Sirius. I have to go to work now."

"Damn it, Remus, just answer the question." He strode across the room to be beside him, looking down he saw the same look that he knew must be mirrored in his own eyes.

"Just stop it, alright?" He straightened and tried to keep his face blank.

"I love you. I don't care if you believe me or not. Moony, I've loved you since I was fourteen."

It all sounded too good to be true. Remus held his breath, hoping that Sirius wasn't just poking fun at him again. "Sirius, I… you're not putting me on, are you?"

He laughed, that familiar bark sounding off the old walls. "I love you… I love everything about you, Moony. I love that you get cold when it's seventy degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to take a shower. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend a day with you I can still smell you on my clothes, and I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night… I just love you."

Remus finally breathed again. "If you are teasing me, I will never talk to you again."

He didn't need to say anything, and didn't feel that Remus did either. The look on his face was enough for Sirius to know that he felt the same. He pulled his dearest friend in and kissed him soundly, reveling that for the first time ever, Remus was kissing back.

They stood together, just holding and feeling whole, until Sirius couldn't take it anymore. "Hey, Remus?"

Remus looked up like he was drowning, and the happiest man alive to be doing so. "Yeah?"

"If I told you you have a nice body, would you hold it against me?" He whispered the words and grinned at the soft laughter that he received. Kissing Remus's nose he chuckled too. "Your turn."

"I…" He bit his lip, trying to think. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good?" He asked hopefully.

Sirius just stared down blankly at him.

Remus chuckled and shrugged. "I told you I was no good at this."

"That was bloody brilliant, mate." He kissed him again, pulling him away from the fireplace. "Bloody brilliant."


End file.
